One of the first things to remember is that it is a day for you and your partner, so you can feel free to be as original as you like, because hopefully you will only do it once so you may as well enjoy it!
DO set a budget as soon as you have set the date and visit a bridal show to see what you might like to have on the day as this will give you an indication of prices. If you have some savings, but you know that it may not cover what you want, work out how long you have before the wedding to put some more money away and be realistic. Admission costs for wedding shows and bridal shows will be money well spent if you cabn strike a deal for something on the day. If the months leading up to the wedding are all about how skint you are because you are still saving up it will take away some of the enjoyment and you risk falling out with your other half before you even get to the big day. Far better to have an early discussion about possible compromises on the numbers of guests, cost of the bridal dress or reception than to realise later on that you can’t afford something that becomes a ‘must have’
DO look at lots of different wedding suppliers and do some research, talk to other clients that they have had, see examples of their work, check what you are getting for your money and ask questions at wedding shows about what they can do to help you achieve your dream wedding. If you don’t feel a connection with the people you speak to, don’t be afraid to walk away, as there are loads of companies attending wedding shows who you can approach that may be a perfect fit for you.
DO choose the right wedding venue. If you have always dreamed of a castle wedding or a particularly popular location, make enquiries early about available dates and bear in mind that it can be cheaper to get married on a week day. If it is a civil ceremony you may also need to book a registrar, so check that someone will be available. Be prepared to be flexible on the date if it means that you can have the setting that you want. Take some family members to a wedding show if you need some advice. If you have lots of guests coming from further afield think about accommodation in the local area. If there are lots of elderly guests will there be suitable facilities for them or somewhere they can relax if they find the day tiring. Thinking about these potential issues early may help you to choose a wedding venue that everyone will love, and you can just relax and enjoy the day.
DO keep all of the wedding planning documentation in one place. If you need to check on the spending or find a particular contact number it means that there is only one place to look. Keep all of the information that you collect at wedding shows, details for fittings for the bridal dress, follow up appointments etc. Make sure that your partner knows where everything is kept as well as anyone else who is helping - mother of the bride, chief bridesmaid, best man etc.
DO make arrangements to visit wedding shows as there may be companies that you have not come across or products that you have not seen that would be ideal for you. Lots of businesses at bridal shows offer discounts for bookings made on the day, so make sure that you have a list with you and an idea of what money you have to spend so you can take up any offers that appeal to you. Wedding shows are also a good way to get ideas and advice without making a lot of appointments, as you can speak to lots of people in one day at a bridal show before making any decisions.
DO consider what your priorities are as a couple before making any big purchases. You may be happy to hire your bridal dress if it means that you will be able to afford a vintage Rolls Royce on the day. Similarly if you have a smaller bouquet you may be able to have a really striking combination of blooms. The groom might be happy to have fewer guests or a smaller stag do if it means that the honeymoon can be extended by a couple of days. If it has always been your intention to keep your bridal dress, make this clear from the outset as the more detail that you can put in place the better and then there will be less chance of a misunderstanding or an expensive mistake.
DO keep a checklist of things especially if you have a large wedding planned so that nothing gets missed out as the average couple uses as many as forty different suppliers when planning their wedding. Make sure that you know when any final payments are due or you need to collect things, and keep the list up to date. It will be satisfying to cross things off as your plans start to come together.
DO delegate some tasks if you can. Lots of brides take their bridesmaids to wedding shows with them for advice on the bridal gown and accessories, and they will love the excitement of a bridal show. People love to feel like they are a part of the celebration and specific tasks will give them a focus other than asking you how it is all going and is there anything they can do to help. If you are sticking to a tight budget and have got some creative people around you get them involved with place settings, favours, invitations, venue decorations, cake making or any other wedding DIY that you have been inspired by from wedding shows if you are happy to have the handmade touch. It is these small details that your guests will remember and it gives you one less thing to worry about.
DO consider having a gift list. Your guests will probably be happy to buy a gift, but this will ensure that you don’t get things that you don’t need and as long as the list caters for different budgets, your guests will probably be glad of the guidance. If you are asking for monetary gifts or vouchers make sure that you tell your guests what their gift will be used for and ensure that thank you cards are sent out promptly, even if you will not be using the money or vouchers straight away so that your guests will feel that their gift has been appreciated. Large department stores attending wedding shows will usually have the facility to set up a registration for your Gift List.
DO remember to enjoy the day! You have probably been dreaming of the time that you put on the bridal dress for real, and all of the planning will be worthwhile if it means that you can be relaxed on the day and your photos will be much better if you spend the day smiling rather than fretting over details. Take a little time in the day to just step back and be in the moment, so that it does not pass by in a whirl and you will have memories to treasure for the rest of your lives.
DON’T make too many decisions all at once – take the time to plan and use all of the advice and information on offer at wedding shows to make informed choices
DON’T feel obliged to take extra services if you just want a basic package, make sure you discuss exactly what you want in detail, so there are no nasty surprises
DON’T feel pressurised in to paying out for things if you are not sure you can afford it, you don’t want to start married life in debt up to your eyes
DON’T book the first company you find, make sure you get references and do some research, how long have they been in business for? Are they happy for you to talk to previous clients? Are their prices competitive? If you are unsure then walk away and think about it. You can easily compare prices from suppliers at wedding shows where you will often find more than one company offering similar services.
DON’T forget about wedding insurance. It may not be as romantic as choosing wedding rings or a honeymoon, but it does give peace of mind for what could be one of the largest amounts of money you will ever spend.
DON’T get swept away with too many little extras on top of the bridal dress and the rings, do you need to have hundreds of wedding favours, out of season flowers, seven bridesmaids, or a free bar? It is easy to blow the budget if you don’t keep track of what you are spending and the smaller details will soon add up.
DON’T put yourselves under pressure to conform. Not everyone wants a church wedding or a white dress or a traditional wedding cake. If you are not a size zero before the wedding it doesn’t mean that your groom will love you any less and if you want to have home made bunting and Aunty Mary’s trifle at your wedding reception then feel free. Your guests will just want to see you in a lovely bridal dress, enjoying your special day.
DON’T let the wedding planning take over your whole lives. It can be a stressful time so make sure you still spend time together as a couple and with friends when any wedding talk is off the agenda.
DON’T make every decision on your own, your family and friends will be a great source of support and advice before and after the wedding and this could make all the difference to how stressed out you feel. Take on specific areas of research when attending wedding shows then get together over lunch and discuss the different options.
DON’T lose sight of the fact that it is only one day in your lives and it will always give you something to talk about if things don’t go according to plan. Keep your sense of humour, if something goes wrong with your plans or on the day just keep smiling and don’t let it spoil things.
